It's awfully painful.
allowed entry at 12:34 am
I don't know why, but I feel so annoyed with people. I can't explain what type of people, but there are just certain types of them that I get so annoyed with.
People who judge your every move.
People who feel like they've got something to prove.
People who like to show off what they've got.
Idk, just... people!
I'm not perfect. I have flaws too. Lots of them.
But this is the reason why I'm SOOO quiet eversince... eversince idk when? But yeah if you hang out with me now, I'm a really quiet person. I've spun 180
°. I think people view me as a stuck up bitch now.
It's so bad that can't even hold a decent conversation with anyone. At all. Except for the boy and my family.
Idk what's become of me.
Anyway, after the sudden realisation that I get easily annoyed with people, I've become quiet.
Cause I'd rather be viewed as stuck up like I've been labelled as since I was younger, than be an annoying person.
I'd also rather be quiet so that people don't talk to me, than be talkative and have people talk nonsense to me.
But anyways I really do not give a fuck whether people like me or not. Cause I don't care. I honestly do not.
I'm content with what I have now and I absolutely do not care about other people, I do not need their acceptance. I'm thankful for my family and for my boy. I'm thankful for having a job that pays well and I'm on track to having a stable life.
And really, I'm thankful for having my boy. He who understands me and knows me inside out. We're slowly chasing after the life we've always dreamed of.
I'm content as long as I have him and my family with me.
I don't know what drove me into writing all that. I guess I'm tired of seeing or hearing people do and talk bullshit.
I'm sick of it.
I'm such a bitch! Oh man. Haaaaaaaaha whatever.
Picture taken in May 2010; when the best and also the worst 3 weeks of my life took place.
I look sick. You look bald. Hahaaah.
I'll be there when your heart stops beating
I'll be there when your last breath's taken away
In the dark when there's no one listening
In the times when we both get carried away
allowed entry at 1:37 am
WHY ARE YOU SO HOT AND HANDSOME, KAKASHI?!
Random facts.
1. I miss smoking sometimes. I tried a puff the other day and my chest started to hurt. Looks like I've officially quit smoking.
2. I sound superficial but I miss looking at my perfect fingers, shoulder, knee and feet. There are scars on them now. And I still can't grip my left hand hahah but, oh well.
3. Instead of calling it a 'pacifier', my dad calls it a 'nipple'. It makes him sound moronic.
4. I miss Aryl Rizqie eventhough I just saw him. I can't wait till April when his mum starts back work and mum and I will start babysitting again. Yeaaah. Back to the old days with Ilyas Reyhan Choa! And yes, my nephews call me "Kakak" eventhough I'm actually their auntie. Cause I'm cool like that.
5. I wish the weekends were the weekdays. And the weekdays were the weekends. So we'd all only have to work for 2 days and relax for 5 days. The world would be awesomeeeeeeee.
Oh my. FO' LIFE!